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The English have never really celebrated their national day as jubilantly as their Celtic cousins celebrate theirs. But that’s slowly starting to change. People are beginning to realise that flying the flag of St. George doesn’t automatically make you a hooligan. And anyway, it’s another great excuse for a party.
Hire a room in a pub or a local hall, or get your friends round to your house and set about celebrating the weird and wonderful world of the English. For décor, go big on the national colours of red and white — crosses of St. George, red and white balloons, bunting and paper chains. Or theme the place around George and his dragon by decking the place out as a medieval banqueting hall.
There are a few ways you can go with attire. The obvious one is to get everyone to come dressed in an English theme. You want to see crusaders, distressed damsels, Robin Hoods, Beatles, Lady Dianas, bowler-hatted City gents or tweedy aristocrats. Wear a floppy hat and a big ruff and you can be William Shakespeare. Wear a full England football kit and a lot of moisturiser and you can be David Beckham.
If you want to get a little more exotic, you can make use of the fact that St. George is patron saint of about half the world’s countries (including Portugal, Ethiopia, Serbia, Greece and Russia) and that the man himself was actually Turkish. Suddenly a whole new range of costumes become possible.
What could be more English and more entertaining than an impromptu spot of morris dancing? All you need is a stick, some bells, a handkerchief and a complete lack of either pride or rhythm. Get some fast, fiddly folk music on the stereo, then skip around like a loon, banging sticks with people or waving a hanky.
A sword fighting competition would help bring the spirit of St. George to the occasion, but as the use of swords is generally frowned upon by Her Majesty’s constabulary, it’s probably best if you hand each contestant a pillow instead.
Other English activities that no St. George’s Day party should be without include talking at length about the weather and complaining about how everything’s going to the dogs.
In the English tradition, the food should be big, bland and unbelievably heavy. Buy a large joint of meat — a rib of beef or a leg of lamb — and roast it with English herbs like rosemary and thyme. Or if you don’t want a sit-down dinner, make a hearty selection of pies. Following on, puddings should be the type that sit on your stomach for days afterwards — bread pudding, spotted dick, treacle tart, all with custard (obviously). If you want to be really English, though, organise a curry.
Again, nothing too delicate or continental. You can have some wine, but only if it’s completely undrinkable and made out of weird English fruits like damsons or gooseberries. Otherwise, buy some real English ale (supermarkets these days do a wide selection of bottles), scrumpy cider (none of that “fashion” cider that you drink with ice) and, if you can possibly find some, a bottle of honey mead.
For the non-drinkers, buy some dandelion & burdock or old-fashioned ginger beer. |  |
| 1. | English Rose / The Jam |
| 2. | Land of Hope and Glory |
| 3. | Jerusalem |
| 4. | Greensleeves |
| 5. | A New England / Kirsty MacColl
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| 6. | There’ll Always Be an England / Vera Lynn |
| 7. | World in Motion / New Order |
| 8. | 3 Lions / Baddiel, Skinner and the Lightening Seeds |
| 9. | Gorgeous George / Edwyn Collins |
| 10. | Why Does It Always Rain on Me? / Travis |
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